Good Day's Sunshine

I guess I should start this post the same way I started off the last post...apologizing. I'm sorry. Life has just been so dang busy lately...if I could just get two more hours squeezed in the day, Id be golden...not gonna happen...oh well.
Anyway, so moving has proven to be more of a chore than any of us imagined...we worked at it all day and when I woke up this morning, it looked like we had a party instead of working. bleckh...whatever. This week's activities also include, chemo, doctors appointments, visiting with a very dear family friend, saying goodbye to my boyfriend's mom...she is moving to New York this week, and attending a weekend wedding starting on Thursday, in Joshua Tree. Yikes. See why I need two extra hours?
Also, please note how I did not even once mention infusions, IV, or Vancomycin. Unfortunately, and fortunately, my mom actually suffered an allergic reaction to it on Friday night...weird, a full TWO weeks later. Don't be alarmed...the allergic reaction was pretty minor considering all of the other allergic reactions we had read about...it ended up feeling like the insides of her body were itching...creepy. We phoned the doctor on call and he said to stop the infusion until Monday when we saw Dr. Paroly.
Today, my friends, is Monday. This means that we went to the doctor...this also means tomorrow is the first day of chemo...with the PICC line...I hope this goes smoothly. My mom has been having some vein issues as of late...well, her veins are just pretty much shit.
Anyway, back to the doctors visit...hang on to your pants, kids...this is a good one!
Lets start off with this...
Dr. Paroly agreed that it doesn't seem as though my mom is needing the infusions anymore. However, we do need to keep an eye on her temp...just in case. This is a victory! This means that we can go to Target and not be tethered to that dang pole anymore! Woo-who!!
And now, we will move onto this....
If you all remember, and I'm sure you do, (especially with my constant reminding) my mom gets her blood taken a few days before the start of chemo to determine her WBC, to see how the kidneys are doing, check out the sodium levels...yadda yadda yadda, right?
So, today, Dr. Paroly tells my mom that
a) her sodium level is a little low...she needs to salt her food a teeny bit. no biggie, we can do that.
b) her potassium level is a little low...no biggie, they have already given her a prescription for that.
c) her WBC are just fine...pretty awesome
d) her platelets and red blood cells are just fine as well.
e)she's a teeny anemic...the doctor says that we all are...just watch it a little better right now.
This has the two of us smiling away. We are so happy to hear that her body is so healthy. I think we wanted to hug each other...but Dr. Paroly is kind of a serious guy and I think we might frighten him if we behaved like we normally do, so we held it in...with big deep breaths.
He also told us that this course of treatment is usually about 6 cycles...we are on the fourth!Woo-who!!! Talk about wanting to hug each other!
He then asked my mom HOW she was feeling...asked about her headaches (there are NONE) chest pain, etc. he then says to my mom..."You really have no symptoms and that is good." Then he knocked on wood and my mom knocked on her head. Funny...shes so crazy.

Today was such a good day. Tiny miracles.

hugs and love to all of you
xo

"Joy is a net of love by which you can catch souls."
Mother Teresa

Im Sorry, So Sorry

I have really been lagging on my blogging duties...my apologies. Life is so busy right now, weird, I know...on top of doing my mom's meds and going to a million appointments, I am also redecorating my house and my boyfriend, Michael is moving in. By the time I am done with everything for the day and sit down to blog, its like 10pm or later and I'm dozing off. Sheesh, I'm getting old!
Enough about me...let's talk about my mom...
so, lets see...we are now on day 7 of home health care and its going pretty good, aside from the two fever spikes that she has had. There isn't really much to say at this point about it...its just a wait and see period right now. the last of her Vancomycin infusions is supposed to be on the 30Th, but since she had the fevers, its looking like she may have to be on it for a bit longer. Oh well, at least shes at home.
Today she went and had the CBC/Chem Panel done and Monday is the follow up appointment to see how the WBC is doing ( this is the pop quiz portion of the blog!). If all of the counts are good, chemo starts Tuesday morning after her Vanco infusion and then continues on to Wednesday and Thursday and ending with the Nulasta shot on Friday.
Sometime during next week, my mom is also going to have the MRI to determine how the brain mets are doing. Okay, guys, this is big...so please, please cross those fingers, send healing light, pray, send positive thoughts or whatever it is that you do and did last time before the CT Scan...whatever it was that you all did then, worked...so keep it up! Please.
I will definitely let you all know what day the scan is...I promise.

I'm going to end this post on a cool note...back in July, when my mom was diagnosed, you may remember that we cut all of our hair and donated it. I wrote a nice little note about our experience and journey, I also included a photo of us. I guess that once the woman gets the wig, she will also receive the letter and photo that we sent...Pretty cool.
Well,today we got a note from Pantene:

"On behalf of Pantene Beautiful Lengths, with heartfelt appreciation, we thank you for giving so selflessly of yourself to women who are faced with hair loss from cancer treatments. Your healthy ponytail will help give self-confidence back to a special woman who is battling cancer so that she can fight the disease with a little more dignity. Your generosity is so touching and we hope that it will inspire many others to make the kindest cut of all. As you may already know, it takes roughly six ponytails to make one Pantene Beautiful Lengths wig. your donation will be joined with five others and transformed into a high quality, real hair wig by HairUWear, our campaign partner and leading global producer of real hair wigs and extensions. We are also honored to work closely with the American Cancer Society. The American Cancer Society distributes Pantene Beautiful Lengths wigs, at no cost, to female cancer patients, through its extensive network of nationwide wig banks. together, we can bring some joy into the lives of women living with cancer. Kindest regards,
Pantene Beautiful Lengths





We live in a wonderful world that is full of beauty, charm and adventure. There is no end to the adventures that we can have if only we seek them with our eyes open. -Jawaharlal Nehru

Nurse Ratched Part 200

So, the new PICC line is working wondrously. However, when I returned this evening at 7.30 to administer the meds, my mom's cheeks were very pink. I immediately made her take off her quilt as well as her goose down blanket and took her temp...a blistering 101.8...damnit and gave her two Tylenol. I then phoned Dr. Paroly and my mom spoke with him. He told her that sometimes you can spike a fever during antibiotics and that's its better to have one during then after the treatment is done. He also told her that there is a tiny possibility that the PICC is already infected so we have to go in tomorrow and get a blood test done. Lets please hope that this is not the case...my mom's veins are crap and they always have been...so finishing the Vancomycin and doing chemo without a PICC or port could be bad.
Here is the temperature progress report...it gets better at the end, kids, I swear, I would not lie:
at 7.45pm it was 101.8
at 8.14pm it was 100.3
at 9.oopm it was 99.5
at 9.30 it was 98.8
I told you it got better.
I laid out her evening meds as well as some Tylenol for her to take every 4-6 hours and a big bottle of water.
Hopefully in the am, she will be fever free still. I feel terrible to have to tell everyone about this news, but its important and I'm sure that all of you want to know.
So, here is to hoping that the PICC is doing just fine, the infection is clearing, the fever is gone, and that the canser is vacating the building.
Thank you so much for all of your continued support, thoughts, prayers, wishes, jokes and all of the other good stuff! We truly appreciate each and everyone of you!
Also, thanks for sending out all of those good vibes for my friend...she is doing really good...shes a tough cookie, too!

"I am extraordinarily patient, provided I get my own way in the end."
Margaret Thatcher

Nurse Ratched Has Taken Over

Sorry to be a lagger on the ol bloggy bloggerton, folks. It has a busy and somewhat stressful last couple of days. Learning to become the Home Health Care Nurse has been quite time consuming. Now that Ive gotten the hang of it I can get back to the blog.

So, here is the scoop:

I hang the antibiotic IV twice and a day, prime the tube, clean the tip of the PICC line (which she got today, flush it with saline, hook the PICC line and the antibiotic together, let that run for 90 minutes, unhook it, flush it with saline, then flush it with herceptin. There are quite a few other things that go along with it...but that's the jest. Its pretty involved but its a very cool learning experience.

Today I actually took out my mom's old peripheral IV...what a trip...here is what it looked like after I took it out.

The light blue part was the part that was inserted in her vein. Please do not fret...this photo was taken after I took it out and laid the IV on the floor.

Alright, sorry to cut it short...but Ive got to go to bed so that Nurse Ratched can get up in time tomorrow morning.

Also, my mom is doing fabulously!

Upon arrival at a mental institution, a brash rebel rallies the patients together to take on the oppressive Nurse Ratched, a woman more a dictator than a nurse. ---One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest

Just Call Me Nurse Ratchett

I'm so sorry to disappoint you all, but we did not break out the Scrabble today...but we did break out of the hospital. Oh yeah...you heard right...we broke out!
The results of the culture came back and it was obviously negative, the infection is NOT growing. Awesome! It will be so nice for my mom to be at home in her own bed and in her own jammies...eating some good food.
The hospital is an interesting place. It's full of so many different emotions...hope, happiness, love, anxiety, sadness...I mean, it's probably the only place on Earth that runs the gamut of emotions...if you could expel all of that energy and use it for good, I think all of the world's problems would be solved. I have also found that when you spend any length of time in there, you start to feel a strange kind of bond with the others that float around the hallways with you. Sometimes you talk to them but most often you don't...you just exchange sympathetic and knowing smiles. There is a a point to this and here it is...during our stay this week, there was a lady that I kept running in to and finally we started to talk. She and her husband (the patient) had been there since August 31st...egads. She told me that they were making arrangements with the hospital to do home health care. The doctors had mentioned this to us as well, but we thought because my mom doesn't have health insurance, this option wasn't available to us. According to my fellow hall wanderer, this was untrue.
So, once both Dr. O'Brien (the hospitalist) and Dr. Paroly said that the results of the culture were negative and she could go home, we immediately began asking how we could get out and go home. Well, all of these lovely, helpful people at the hospital worked out a plan and set us up with home health care!
Here is how it is going to work...and bear with me here...this alot of information...and I apologize if some of this info gets jumbled or confusing.
My mom was to receive a PICC line before we went home, but they were so backed up that we had to reschedule the PICC line for Monday morning. Once her infection clears up, she get a new Medi-port, until then she gets a pick line...but before the PICC line, she just has a regular ol peripheral IV. For those of you who do not know what a pick line is: basically, its just like a regular peripheral IV, except that it can be used for longer periods of time. A regular IV can only be used for 3 days and then has to be moved...a PICC line can stay in for up to 30 days.
Now on to the home health care part...tomorrow morning a nurse will come to the house and set up the meds and then teach me how to administer the meds into the IV, how to clean it, how to flush it and I'm sure a million other things. Her medication will be administered twice a day for 90 minutes until September 30th. The nurse will come to the house 2 times a week to check up on everything and make sure I am doing everything properly. He will also take her blood at those times to see how the infection is doing.
Whew! I gots me alot of learning to do!
I told you all that I was going to be an Oncology nurse eventually and this is just getting me one step closer!
I know that I say this all of the time...but I will keep saying it forever and ever...
Thank you so much, all of you, for all of your love notes, good energy, positive thoughts and spot on humor! Keep em coming!
Thank you for sending out the good vibes for my friend that I spoke about about last night and a big thank you to all of the amazing nurses at Tri-City...the hardest working girls we know! Those girls rock!
So, rest up tonight my friends because you all have alot of information coming to you tomorrow!
...and oh yeah...please feel free to do the happy dance because my mom is HOME!!


"It's what you learn after you know it all that counts."
~Attributed to Harry S. Truman

Thinly IS A Word

Guess what we did today?
We played SCRABBLE! oh yeah! And for those of you who are wondering...my mom kicked my ass!
208 to 235!
shoot...tomorrow I'm gonna whoop her! just kidding...
So, I am redecorating my bedroom and since my mom cant go with me, everyday I have been bringing in my new purchases for her advise. Yesterday I brought in my new curtains and we hung them on the wall. We got tons of complements on them...so I think I will keep them! Today I brought in the curtain rod...and wow did I get some weird looks! haha too funny! What a bunch of weirdos we are! At least it helps to pass the time, right?
Enough of the babbling...on to the important part...
there is no real change in the infection, yet. They took a blood culture yesterday and tomorrow we get the results on whether or not it is growing. God, I hope it isn't...I don't think my mom could handle being there 30 seconds longer than she has to. Thank the heavens above that my mom's nurses are all the bomb, otherwise I think we would be in big trouble!
I will keep you posted about the invader tomorrow.
So keep your fingers crossed that it is clearing up.
Speaking of keeping fingers crossed...a friend of mine was recently diagnosed with melanoma and she is having a surgery on Monday. Please send out loads of love and healing light for her!

Canser really sucks the big one...lets all do our part, in honor of ourselves and the people that we love, and support canser research. Let's bring as much light to this terrible disease as we possibly can...let's make canser our bitch!
Lots of love to all of you!
xxx

oh shoot...i have been meaning to add this photo. it was taken on dress up day...tuesday?

enjoy it...i know you will.

" There is no pleasure in having nothing to do; the fun is in having lots to do and not doing it."
Mary Wilson Little

Double Word Score

Today we played Scrabble...ALOT. When I say alot, I mean three times...in a row. We had so much fun! So much fun in fact, that we wondered why we hadn't been playing it all along. duh. It really helped pass the time too!

Considering the results\orders we received today, we will be playing alot more.

Unfortunately it looks like my mom is not getting out of the hospital any time soon. Two weeks is the sentence. TWO WEEKS!! Holy hell, what are we going to do for three weeks in a hospital room the size of a shoebox? We cant even go outside. Oh brother, this will be the test of our wills.

However, if the medi-cal kicks in, she can go home anytime after Friday so long as we get home health care. If you don't know anything about home health care in this situation, it is this...a nurse comes in and teaches me how to change her IV antibiotics bags and then returns like once everyday or every other day. And for those of you who wondering about ME changing the bags and whatnot, I will SO do it if it means she gets to go home.

Also, please know that my mom is by no means under the weather, feeling sick or any of that other stuff...she's is absolutely fine aside from that pesky little infection. So, if you are worrying, you can stop now, she really is okay. I swear.

Well, nothing else much happened today, so instead of boring you to tears I'm going to leave you with this poem that I found today. Its really cool.

"I found this poem today that reveals the strength borne in two friends upholding one another as they found themselves fighting cancer, but standing strong--growing in the process...Heartprints, Bren

*************************************************************

"THE CANCER TREE" was conceived through love and heartfelt encouragement, survivor to survivor. With poems written between two cancer survivors, trust was born and a friendship developed. If you have cancer, you're not a victim, you are a survivor! As long as you have breath, regardless of your diagnosis, you are still surviving.

THE CANCER TREE

For those of us sitting in Cancer's Big Tree

the decision to climb up was not worry-free,

But new growth was nurtured by warm, loving hands

the roots of the tree anchored deep in the land

Up high in these limbs we are strangely secure

where we once felt unsteady, we feel strong, we feel sure

~~Claudia (chenheart) XOXO

I caught a branch and climbed that tree

and wished YOU were sitting there high up with me

I caught another limb with my other hand,

and twirled to the trunk, and then shimmied down

I thought, if Chen tried doing what I just did,

I hope she wouldn't fall

Then I remembered, if she really tried

and she missed that branch

I'd just reach out and catch her...that's all!

~~Love ya,Ceezhar (Brenda)

The branch you held onto while climbing that tree,

was already filled with the essence of me

I watched as you climbed, could you not feel my smile?

I knew you were worried, it felt like a mile!

The blossoms that cushioned you bounced back in shape,

and fragranced the air, as you mimicked an ape!

I know we could both have made this climb alone

but to make it together...seeds of trust have been sown!

~~Chenheart

A seed, you say? Yes, we planted it together

I'll bet it will grow, bloom, and last forever

No hoe or spade, to keep it alive,

unnecessary things aren't needed to survive

Only understanding, a shoulder, and bits of love

will make a small sprout grow high up above

So sprouts we were, when the "C" visits came,

now giant oaks we've become, with cancer to blame

But wait, look up there, and down all around,

at the branches with survivors, and new sprouts on the ground

I see that they're growing, with help from each other...

a hug, a word, we're all sister and brother

See, there's that hand that caught us, and made our climb eased,

it's big, it's gentle, Oh Chen...it's God, and He knows about

this disease!

~~Ceezhar

XXOOCopyright 2004 byClaudia Cable & Brenda C. Corbin

This, my friends, is my mom's former BFF, her alien, Marcel Medi-port. Regrettably, their friendship has suffered irreparable damage, it is beyond repair. Its sad to see and they really do miss each other...but they will always have Tri-City.


Please join me for a moment of silence in misty eyed fond remembrance for this little bugger.

Okay, that was enough for that...now on to the search for my mom's NEW BFF. We aren't sure exactly when our lives will be graced with it's presence because the staph infection is still in the building...it has yet to vacate. However, once it does, here comes the new port! My mom is really looking forward to that...seriously...she currently has a peripheral IV and it is driving her bananas.
Speaking of bananas...wow are we ever going bananas in the hospital! We are like freakin pigeons in the hen house and we are about to fly the coop!and the WORST part of it is that we have absolutely NO CLUE when she gets to go home! Dr. Paroly said today that she has to stay until the infection has cleared up...he added, "Get comfortable."

Erg. Splat. and egads.

My mom was so bored today that she just kept falling asleep and I got so bored that I made my own mini photo shoot in the loo with a kids Mickey Mouse mask and my mom's new hat. Here is the proof....

BOREDUM...but lets talk about how cute that hat is! One of the nurses, Cindy, brought in a bag of hats for my mom to choose from and this is the one she got. When I walked in this morning, I had to do a double take because I thought she had grown hair overnight! In person, or just on her, it actually almost looks like hair. Wait here she is being "Fronche' or French to you and me...

Who knows what will become of us tomorrow. Please pray for our souls...we will most certainly need it.

I feel so bad complaining...at least I get to go home at night.

Tomorrow, in an effort to cure the boredom and prevent the white coats from admitting us to the loony bin, I am bringing some bored games...shooot maybe we should put on a talent show for the nurses and patients...now there's an idea!that will surely keep us out of the loony bin! hahahaha!

Alright friends....see ya on the flip side!

"There is a direct correlation between the level of happiness in one's life and the amount of silliness they allow into it. I know, I've done studies!"

Milestones and Boredom

Today I have been blogging for a whole 31 days! Can you believe it?! And you have only been bored to tears 28 times!

Speaking of being bored to tears...today was day number 4 in the hospital. erg.spalt.egads...we are BORED!!!

In between the confusion of "Is the port coming out today?" "Is the port coming out tomorrow?" We slept. We ate. We watched Anthony Bourdain. We slept. We dreamt about food. Somewhere around lunchtime they came and took my mom for an EKG...do not worry...just routine money spending, er, I mean, just routine tests. I'm guessing that all of you know what an EKG is so we wont go into that learning center today..plus, my friends, it's 10pm and I am FAR too tired to teach this evening...however, if you don't know, I will be oh so glad to teach at a later date.

After my mom returned from the EKG (electro-cardio gram) we ate. We slept. We watched more Anthony Bourdain. Then just as the clock struck 5pm, homey from ID (infectious diseases) came up and we wheeled my mom right down stairs and got that blasted port out...which by the way, she kept!

Now that the port is out they have given her a peripheral IV (in her arm) which really stinks because now she just feels immobile...but they may be putting a new port in a different spot in just a few days. That little port makes life so much easier...

anyway, I'm off to bed, my friends...until tomorrow.

and as always...keep sending the love and healing light!

xo

"A little nonsense now and then, is cherished by the wisest men."

Willy Wonka

The Prescription Isn't More Cowbell

Good Sunday to you all!
Okay...so, Ive got good news and Ive got bad news and then Ive got some more good news. Remember that pesky fever on Friday? Well, it's gone and hasn't returned. However, we did find out the reason for the aforementioned fever as well as the results from the blood cultures. Unfortunately, my mom has a staph infection and they have determined that the Medi-port is the cause. Good news, bad news.

Since they have found the cause the port has to come out and they will replace it at a later date once she is all healed and the infection has left the building. Good news, bad news.

Listen, none of this news is meant to cause alarm in any, way, shape or form and I apologize if it does so.


Good news, bad news...my mom was actually admitted to the hospital yesterday, which is perfect...now they can keep a closer eye on the infection. They are currently giving her fluids through an IV (in her port) as well as giving her a very very strong antibiotic called Vancomycin. Oh and I forgot they are also regularly feeding her really crappy food...she is none too happy about that.

However, all in all, she is doing great...she looks great and she says she feels great...except that she is a wee bit tired because her sleep keeps getting interrupted by having to go to the loo so often...we can thank the fluids for that.

So, the port is coming out sometime tomorrow but I'm not sure when she will actually be released from the hospital. I think she secretly likes it there...I have no choice but surrender my supervisory title over to the nurses, therefore leaving her alone and getting out of her proverbial "hair".

It has also been really nice seeing all of the nurses who originally treated her back in late July and early August. They were all very pleased with her overall health and wellness...as a matter of fact they quite raved about her looks as well. She's looking good...nice and healthy and that bald head of hers suits her rather nicely.

If you are worried about her and I'm sure you all are, feel free to leave some love on here, email, or myspace. Unfortunately we are keeping the visitors down to just me and my dad as well as keeping the visiting down...each of us are going alone and only spending short amounts of time with her. She's tired and fighting off an infection so we are letting her get as much rest as possible... we need her to get nice and healthy.

Please keep the love, good vibes and positive healing light a'flowin...she needs it.

hugs to all of you!

xxx

leave some love here....\

\/

Chicken Soup for the Body and Soul

It has been a long day, my friends.
Today was the last day of chemo.
When I arrived here at 8.15 this morning, my mom had a fever of 102. Apparently, my mom was having the chills and shakes all night, poor thing, and could hardly sleep. We called Dr. Paroly's office and they suggested that we come in right away. When we got there our lovely Paula took charge of my mom, took her temperature, gave her an extra bag of fluid, gave her some Tylenol for the fever, hooked her up to her chemo, called in her antibiotics to the pharmacy and made some appointments for her over at Tri-City to get some blood cultures so that they could find out what type of infection my mom has. Paula let us know that the infection definitely had nothing to do with her WBC count...she said that there is a "bug" going around, so my mom just may have a wee bit of a cold.
Paula gave me some strict orders in regards to taking care of my mom...I just hope my dad follows them too...he's kinda a rule breaker! hahaha
Anyway, Paula's orders aren't that strict. I need to giver her 2 Tylenol every four to six hours, take her temp every four to six hours and give her tons of fluids. No biggie.
So, we finished chemo, my mom got the Neulasta and off we went to Tri-City. Surprisingly, we weren't there for very long. We checked in at the Out Patient desk and five or so minutes later we were off to get blood drawn. I think, in total, we were there for a little under an hour. wow.
I really don't know when we will receive the blood test results but you can bet that I will keep you all posted.
Now we are home and my mom is sleeping after I feed her a big ol honkin bowl of Chicken and Stars soup and loaded her up on meds and Gatorade. Ah..sweet sleep...im going to join her!
I hope that everyone has a happy Friday and an awesome weekend!
Send out the good vibes and love for a speedy recovery for our little Kazza!
hugs to you
xx

ps. i just took her temp and it is...drum roll, please....98.8! here's to hoping it stays that way!


"A hug is a great gift — one size fits all, and it's easy to exchange."

Lesson 2 part 97

Day Two at chemo. My mom, as usual is handling it superbly. Our chemo buddy, Mike has not returned, which is a bummer...but it has been oh so quiet in there. Today I read and my mom rocked out to her ipod.
and then when we got home, i made this:


Yummy! It's quinoa (kee-no-ah) with stir fry broccoli, carrots, onion and mushroom. For those of you who haven't had quinoa...try it...it's good. It is these teeny tiny little "bubbles" that kinda pop when you eat them...amazing and interesting texture...its soft and a wee bit of fluffy. What it isn't is pasta or rice, although you cook it just like rice.




Here is a photo of uncooked Quinoa.




Quinoa contains a balance of essential amino acids, which makes it a complete source of protein. Excellent for vegetarians. Its also gluten free, as well as a good source of dietary fiber, magnesium and iron. NASA actually uses in long manned space flights because it is so packed full of the good stuff.
Apparently, it is also super yummy for breaky...mix it up with almonds, honey and berries. We are so gonna try that!
"Nothing will benefit human health and increase the chances for survival of life on Earth as much as the evolution to a vegetarian diet." Albert Einstein
Well, I suppose that is enough on the benefits of food today...hahaha!
Tomorrow is the last day of chemo, which means that my mom also receives the Neulasta shot. Have I taught you all about the Nuelasta shot yet?
If I have, bear with me...
Chemo suppresses the white blood cell count...remember when we talked about WBC (white blood cell count) a few weeks ago?
A low WBC can put patients at risk for infection, which will also cause them to have to skip or reschedule chemo appointments. Nuelasta is a booster for those little buddies, the WBC, and helps reduce the risk of infection and interruption of chemo.
We love this little shot...we will take all of the help that we can get!


*This post is dedicated to eating healthy and staying healthy...long live the sketch potato*

"Eat a live toad the first thing in the morning and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day."

Spread Your Wings

The Old Man and the Butterfly

Once upon a time in a land far far away. There was a wonderful old man who loved everything. Animals, spiders, insects ...

One day while walking through the woods the nice old man found a cocoon.

Feeling lonely he decided to take the cocoon home to watch its beautiful transformation from a funny little cocoon to a beautiful butterfly.

He gently placed the cocoon on his kitchen table, and watched over it for days

Suddenly on the seventh day the cocoon started to move. It moved frantically! The old man felt sorry for the little butterfly inside the cocoon. He watched it struggle and struggle and struggle!

Finally the old man feeling so sorry for the cocooned butterfly rushed to its aide with a surgical scalpel and gently slit the cocoon so the butterfly could emerge.

Just one slice was all it took, and the butterfly broke free from its cocoon only to wilt over in a completely motionless state.

The old man did not know what to think. Had he accidentally killed the little butterfly? No, its still moving a little bit.! Maybe its sick!

Who the heck would know? He was dumbfounded, and quite perplexed! What should I do, he said. Well he felt so sorry for the little creature that he decided the best thing he could do for the butterfly was to place it gently back into its cocoon.

He did so, and placed a drop of honey on it to seal the cocoon, leaving the butterfly to nestle in its natural state.

Well the next day he noticed that the cocoon was moving again. Wow, he said! It moved and moved and struggled and struggled. Finally the butterfly broke free from its cocoon and stretched its wings out far and wide. Big time yawn! Its beautiful wings were filled with wonderful colors! It looked around and took off! It was flying! Its so beautiful! The old man was jumping with joy! Wow!

Go Baby, Go! And that wonderful butterfly did that just that, it flew and flew till it was almost out of the old mans sight. What a joy, he exclaimed!

But then he started to think. What did I do wrong by trying to help that beautiful little butterfly out at first?

The old man went into town. Found the library, and read every book he could on butterflies and cocoons.

Finally the answer appeared. The butterfly has to struggle and struggle while inside the cocoon. That's how it gets its strength. That's just what they are designed to overcome in order to be strong and beautiful.

Well needless to say the old man was shocked, saddened, and somewhat relieved.

Now he knows the reason why they do what they do. It was only his perception that made it appear that the butterfly was having a hard time. Well from then on the old man knew that loving something sometimes means to pray for it and cheer it on!

He realized that God was wonderful, and that sometimes appearances aren't what they seem to be. That we all are beautiful butterflies, even though we have our apparent struggles in life...

Be Still My Beeting Heart

Mmmmm....a heart-beet for our morning beet juice....we have found that we just don't like going through the day without it. I think it's become our new addiction.
Anywho-skoo...I hope all is well in everyone's world...its all good in ours.
Today was round three of chemo. Pretty uneventful...and I'm not complaining. I never thought in my life that I would be happy to say that my day was uneventful! hahaha!
My mom is handling the chemo like a champ, really. Actually, she isn't handling it any different than she handles anything else in her life.
We have chemo for the next two days and then off again for 21...unless Dr. Paroly changes the treatment in any way. Radiation starts towards the end of September-beginning of October...we aren't quite sure about that just yet...we have to have the MRI done first, which should be the last week of September.
I will remind all of you, you know I will, when that date is.
So, until then, please keep those fingers crossed for continued clean scans and clean MRI's. We are all in this together...and boy are we lucky to have EACH AND EVERYONE OF YOU! You contribute to our joy, laughter and endorphin rush everyday! So, keep posting comments and sending all of that glorious love!
Thank you doesn't seem adequate, but thank you, thank you, thank you.

*and if it isn't too much too ask, please send out some good vibes for my neighbors father. their family just found out that he, too, has canser.*

man, canser really effing sucks.

"Alice laughed: "There's no use trying," she said; "one can't believe impossible things."
"I daresay you haven't had much practice," said the Queen. "When I was younger, I always did it for half an hour a day. Why, sometimes I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast."
Alice in Wonderland.

Elvis is Still the King

Just a quick little note....my mom said this earlier...

"But all is good with the news we got today...
we are kicking ass and taking names...
some of the old ugly C has already left the building
Thank you Elvis!!!!"





This post is dedicated to hip-swiveling dance moves.

Catch a Wave and We're Sitting On Top of The World

Alright, Kids...brace yourselves and get ready to get up and shake your booty til you give
yourself a headache.
Holy sh*t!
We are dancing all over canser's ass today!
I can barely contain my excitement...so let me take a breather so that i can get this out in proper...oh forget it!!
THE TUMOR IS NOT GROWING!!!!
DID YOU HEAR THAT?!!!
NOT EFFING GROWING!
We are dancing and crying and laughing and celebrating and doing Uncle Mark's fist pump into the air!
Okay...let me take a deep breath now and give the info the best I can...
Here is what Dr. Paroly actually said...
he does not see any growth and as a matter of fact he doesn't see anything AT ALL. Apparently, in conjunction with the tumor on her lung, she had some questionable spots on her liver and her kidney...not anymore...they are GONE!!!
He said that he cant get a real clear view of the tumor on her lung because
A) the lung is still collapsed
and
B) there is mucous blockage
C) and most importantly...because it isn't growing!
Mucous blockage is normal and sometimes the patient will start coughing and POP there goes the lung and it expands back to its old self.
So, now on to some deep breathing exercises to get that mucous to come up (gross, i know...sorry if i spoiled your lunch) and get that left lung up and running!
wow.
Life is good!
Life is better than good!
I can't thank all of you enough for all of your strength, support, finger crossing, healing light and positive vibes! Please keep them coming!
We still have a few more rounds of chemo as well as radiation...we aren't sure for how long, but at least we can see the light at the end of the tunnel!
So here's to us, here's to all of you and
here's to kicking canser's ass and taking names!

a million squishy hugs
xxx

"Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours."
AYN RAND

Good Vibrations

My mom got her CBC/Chem Panel done today. Tomorrow we go to the Oncologists office and get the results of that test...here's to healthy White Blood Cell counts!!! Also, equally important we get the results of the CT Scan that she had done last week. This is the really important one, remember? This is the one that tells how the canser ISN'T doing. Remember that one? So let's all keep those fingers crossed my friends for ungrowing, dying canser, good clean results!
The appointment is at 9.40 am.
I will post the good news when we get back...hopefully we will arrive home around 11am.



"Gotta keep those lovin good vibrations"
Brian Wilson

Hair Today, None Tomorrow

I wanted to share this little poem that I found yesterday...its pretty cute.

There once was a woman who woke up one morning, looked in the mirror, and noticed she had only three hairs on her head.
'Well,' she said, 'I think I'll braid my hair today.' So she did and she had a wonderful day.
The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and saw that she had only two hairs on her head.
'Hmmm,' she said, 'I think I'll part my hair down the middle today.'
So she did and she had a grand day.
The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and noticed that she had only one hair on her head. 'Well,' she said, 'Today I'm going to wear my hair in a pony tail.'
So she did and she had a fun, fun day.
The next day she woke up, looked in the mirror and noticed that there wasn't a single hair on her head. 'YEA!' she exclaimed, 'I don't have to fix my hair today!'
Attitude is everything.
Be kinder than necessary, for everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle.
Live simply,
Love generously,
Care deeply,
Speak kindly....... Leave the rest to God.
Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...
It's about learning to dance in the rain!

Well, we are off to get the CBC/Chem Panel today and to go to Target to get some new curtains for my casita.
Here is to hoping the WBC count is nice and healthily high!

If you see this geezer today, tell him Happy 21 st Birthday!
We love you Steven!

“Seek the wisdom of the ages, but look at the world through the eyes of a child.”

Ron Wilde

A Note From Your Favorite Cheerleader...And Mine

Heya Kids!
Just chillin, enjoying the warmth of the September sun, getting ready to stop by and see my mom, continue on to Target because as you all know, that's my favorite place on Earth, and stop by a little birthday party. My first real outing with my friends since my mom's diagnosis.
However, before I journey off for the afternoon, I wanted to share this little note with you. It is actually my mom's new "About Me" from her Myspace page. Yeah, I stole it...so? I thieved it and I'm proud.

My Journey Stuck in a Chinese Fortune Cookie Factory or.. oh yea I have can Cancer so let's move on.... Imagine my surprise on July 27th I found out I had lung Cancer that had metastasized to my brain..HA and here I thought I was just having my usual blond moments with a twist.
But don't cry for me Argentina. Because quite frankly I am over that and just want to see smiling faces. All my life I have been considered upbeat and positive. Michelle aka Maxx used to detest having her friends meet me cause they would say "Why can't you be like your Mom. She so positive." (Believe me she is SO that now!)She would always call me the cheerleader, yep that is me.
After all why suck on the pit of a cherry when you can can get the sweet taste from the fruit?
At this date I have now had 3 weeks of radiation and getting ready to do my 3rd round of chemo. WooHoo so much fun. And yes all I have on my chrome dome now is peach fuzz. Kind of refreshing and yet who would know that a bald head would sweat so much.
I always knew that I had an amazing and loving family and friends but I never really knew how many, how helpful, how supportive and loving each and everyone of them truly are. So remember to thank your blessings everyday.
But I must say Nick and Michelle are my DREAM TEAM(the NBA has nothing on these two!!!)Maxx has been my secretary answering calls,making appointments. She has been my juicer,and my lunch maker, my chauffeur to most all my appointments and on and on. And Nick has been my rock, my shoulder and some of my insanity. He hovers over me like his baby chick (well he really calls me his Petal) None the less I love you both... I love you ,love you babies I love you.

Ok so that is My Journey...now I am going back to the Chinese Fortune Cookie Factory cause quite frankly it's a funnier place. (yea I said funnier)

Thanks again for all of the support, comments, phone calls, cards, emails, prayers and claps! I can even begin to explain or express how much all of your kindness means to us. Frequently, your love pushes us through and makes us smile from the inside out. So, if you wouldn't mind, please, please keep it coming!
Hearts and hugs to every last one of you!
xo


"life is a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death, so live, live live"
auntie mame

Let's Stand Up To Canser...EVERYDAY

So, here I sit on a Friday night getting ready to tune into "Stand Up To Cancer." I caught a bit of it earlier...it seems like its going to be very touching and inspiring. I know that some of the things that I have been reading on the interweb about it and some people are a bit skeptical about it being a "telethon"...I say hold that thought.
Look at what is happening here..three major networks are working together to spread the word about canser. It is about time something like this happened...lets make people more aware. Canser steals so many people from us everyday...1500 to be exact. We have to help stop the progress of this terrible and deadly disease.
Let's Get Involved!
Lets Stand Up To Canser Everyday!
We are going to do our part, starting with a benefit, as well as the start of a foundation, in November, aka Lung Canser Awareness Month.
We are just in the beginning stages of the planning and believe me, I WILL keep everyone posted!
So, if you can,please try to check out this show tonight and grow your brain..knowledge is power!
These shirts are pretty cute...
Stand Up To Canser T-Shirts: http://www.cafepress.com/su2c

This is the manifesto that I pulled off of the Stand Up To Cancer website...

We used to have such crazy dreams.
The kind of dreams that brought us together,
made us not mere mortals,
but a movement.
We used to dream we'd get to the moon.
And we were crazy enough,
fanatical enough,
relentless enough,
to get there.
We dreamed we'd split the atom.
Make smallpox and polio whispers from forgotten history books.
Make technology infinite, individual. Connect the world.
All the unbelievable and the impossible,
all the can't do and the never will,
we overwhelmed them,
we overpowered them,
we conquered them.
They said no and we,
well,
We said yes.
We stood up.
We stood up and changed the world.
Stand up
when everybody else sits down
Stand up
when it's easier to turn away
Stand up for everyone who can't rise anymore
When the answer seems impossible,
stand up
When the dream is right within our reach,
stand up
When the powerful refuse your call,
stand up
The moment is now and the time has come to stand up.
One out of every two men
One out of every three women
will face these diseases we call cancer.
Our sisters, our brothers, our fathers,
our mothers,our husbands, our wives, our children.
Our very best friends and those we've yet to meet.
One person every minute,
one person in a moment gets lost,
gets stolen,
gets taken away.
We are a tapestry of lives touched and brought together by a terrorist we can actually find.
And in the time it's taken to read this,
three more Americans have died.
Unforgivable.
This is where the end of cancer begins.
When together we become a force unmistakable.
A movement undeniable.
A light that cannot dim.
When we take our wild impossible dreams
And make them possible
Make them true
When together we rise as one
When we stand up
When we Stand Up To Cancer.

Keep On Truckin'

Happy Thursday!
We went to the Radiology place today to do the CT Scan.
Quick!
What is a CT Scan?
Just kidding....
Anyway,back to the CT Scan... my mom fasted from midnight until, well, lunch time even though the appointment was at 9am...we didn't get home til after 11am...therefore she "fasted" until lunch...whatever, enough of these side notes and silly ramblings...
Fasting sucked...but what was even worse than fasting was the gross stuff that she had to drink first (TWO FULL GLASSES)...ucky...its technical name is "Contrasting Fluid". It looks like chalk, has the texture of chalk and tasted like pineapple flavored, you guessed it, chalk. The reason for ingesting this putrid liquid is this, it helps to give a clearer image of that stupid canser...you know, that stupid canser that isn't growing? Yeah, that's right...i am willing it into submission...i am willing it to shrink, shrivel and *poof* be gone.
Until then, we just...w..a..i..t...
BUT, we are not going to WASTE our time or our energy WAITING. We are far too busy living. and hanging out. and having fun. and gossiping. and, well, just being the girls that we are. No hand wringing, worrying waiting...just regular, put it to the back of your mind kinda waiting. Pssht, honesty, we don't have time to wait..plus that is quite frankly, giving canser far too much power. My mom has come up with a saying that has preempted "Incurable isn't a declaration, its a dare"...
"Shit, I have canser...so, what...let's move on."
Pretty good and I wholeheartedly agree.
We have better things to do...like shopping, going to the movies, being fools, saving the world...you know the usual...
so...let's move on.
My mom is a true inspiration. dang.
I hope one day that I have half as much tenacity and resilience as she does.
My mom frickin rocks!




"The best way out is always through." -Robert Frost

Its Oh So Quiet...Oh So Still

So far today has been a quiet, uneventful day. We haven't even juiced yet! My god...I hope that I'm not going to be struck down by the juicing gods! Before I get vilified let me explain...we ran out of beets and I haven't made it to the store yet..yeah, yeah...sure we could have a green juice...but the beet juice is so much yummier and since I read that beets have tumor inhibiting properties I have become obsessed with them. I guess there are worse things to be obsessed with, right?
I suppose right now would be the perfect time to get my lazy arse up and trek on over to the grocery...except that I am quite enjoying blogging outside basked in the warmth of the sun...my mom, aka Kazza, is inside taking a wee little nap. She is still pretty tired from her flurry of activity this weekend as well as all of that business with her port yesterday. Which, by the way, according to her, is feeling a little better.
As I mentioned in yesterday's blog, tomorrow is CT Scan day...then we get to wait and wait for the results. Blech. That's lame...waiting is the hardest part (thank you, Tom Petty).
I feel okay about that though because for some reason, for weeks now, I haven't imagined doing any more treatments passed the ones that we are currently scheduled for...this next round of chemo that starts on the 10Th and the next round of radiation that starts at the end of September. My has said the same thing...here's to hoping that the two of us have grown a psychic bone!
Well, rather than bore you all with this boringness, I am going to sign off for now and do some grocery shopping!
hugs to all of you!
...and remember....keep those fingers crossed!!!


"Chance is always powerful. Let your hook be always cast; in the pool where you least expect it, there will be a fish."
ovid

Yesterday

Well, yesterday was a holiday and we treated it as such. I had every intention of going to the beach and chillin...but the sun started to fade away and the clouds rolled in, I hunkered down for some down and dirty political brouhaha and news of the tropical storm Gustav. Meanwhile, on the other side of the freeway my mom spent the day puttering and tinkering and mostly sleeping. She was certainly a tired little buddy.



Apparently, sometime yesterday her Medi-port started to bug her a wee bit so today we went over to the hospital where she had it put in so that they could check it out. The doctor didn't seem to be too concerned with it and they told us to just keep on eye on it. I think she may have just slept on it wrong...but what do I know? I'm no Oncologist, right? Well, not yet, anyway!




Oh, its has just occurred to me that some of you may not know what a Medi-port is. Well, its a device that is inserted directly under your skin so that the medication (such as chemo) may be delivered right into your system. Its a round little thingy (technical term) known as a septum, which depresses with a special "butterfly" needle which allows the chemo to pass through the "tail" and directly into the vein. Blood may also be drawn through this little fella as well. No more poking! Medical science is pretty freakin amazing!
Its pretty teeny, really and you can hardly see it...my mom calls it her "little alien."


Well, boys and girls, that was your lesson for today. Study, study, study...there may be a pop quiz tomorrow.
Speaking of tomorrow...we have nothing planned except for rest and relaxation as we, or she, fasts in prep for the first CT Scan since the big diagnosis.
Does anyone need a refresher on what a CT Scan is?
It is a three dimensional xray that allows the doctor to see "how the canser is doing".
I hope the canser is doing shitty! :)
So, I ask of all you loverly, wonderous, superduper friends and family that you keep up all of the positive vibes and that all of you keep your collective fingers crossed that the scan is lookin goooood!
hearts and hugs!

"There is no duty we so much underrate as the duty of being happy."
Robert Louis Stevenson